I help Powerful People Discover and Love who they are so that they can live with Integrity, Heart, and Purpose.
You have been called.
You know there is a challenging and sacred journey ahead.
The path of Faith is not for everyone.
Let’s go.
My story
Do you know that feeling, where you just feel different?
I have spent my life living in two worlds. One is a world of magic, yearning, and faith - my inner life, the connection to my intuition, to nature, my art, the sacred experience of my body feeling the urge to love… and the other world: the “reality” where I had first to reject, and then spend most of my life reclaiming to embody who I am.
I have never felt “normal,” so I lived in my make-believe world. Early on, I learned that to feel safe and welcome, I needed to perform and hide.
Born in Colombia, once my parents divorced I grew up moving across the world following the path of my artist step-father, living between Russia, Israel, and Canada, and never really feeling like I belonged anywhere. The odd duck, and the last kid to be picked on the sports team.
So, at 8 years old, after being bullied at my new school in Israel, I chose to start hiding who I was, and that is when I gave up my power.
That’s what happens when you decide it is unsafe to be yourself. I chose to push away my truth and shut down my power to Embody my Worth.
It took 20 years for me to start reclaiming it and that is how I got here.
As I let others decide what my value was, and as I ran after validation and acceptance, I would find freedom in spending hours alone performing in imaginary stories where I could finally be myself and feel my body expand with the energy and power to love who I was.
And in church. In prayer.
Until I had to go back to the real world again.
Isn’t it perfect that my first chosen profession made it obvious for me to go through life, hiding my truth?
I became an actress.
I had always liked living out other people’s stories because it was the only place I felt safe to be in my own body.
Meanwhile, I had a hidden life.
A life where I had an intimate relationship with God, but no one really knew about it.
Having always felt a deep yearning to find the sacred and the mystical in my life, I had also secretly explored healing, and spirituality, always trying to find a sense of inner worth and purpose in a teaching or a practice.
For years I got lost in the “new age” philosophies of ascension and healing only to realize that that was not the path of Truth.
It was a path to bring me into the darkness of being lost, and alone, and to return to the light.
I knew that I had a deep yearning for God, and asking Him what he needs me to do, so I can serve Him.
But I abandoned Him.
I ran away into all kinds of ego trips.
In my late twenties after my intuition had pushed me to end an abusive relationship, and I found myself in the middle of my acting career, disillusioned and alone, I gave it all up.
I still could not find my worth or my value. I could not feel my womb and lost my libido. Sitting by myself in my studio apartment I knew that I did not know who I was.
I became disconnected from the people and things that used to fill my time. Nothing satisfied the emptiness I felt, which had been in there all my life, but now was making me physically unwell.
As I was going through what felt like a life crisis, I lost my stepfather to cancer, and that was the last straw.
I felt the fragility of life, and also numbness. I could not feel any grief or sadness.
I suddenly felt the weight of never really having known who I was, because I had tried so hard to find my value in my career or my partnerships.
I knew that what I had been doing was not working.
I knew what I was looking for was the Sacred. God.
Everywhere. And I could not find it.
I was trying to connect to my purpose and my worth, to define meaning in what I was doing, and I knew I needed something other than society or my ego-mind to show me the way.
I had always used my intellect or my looks as a way to get recognition for my worth and power.
None of that worked.
You know the feeling when You Knew The truth is there, but You can’t fully see it?
Yes. Me too.
I knew there was a powerful woman inside of me who knew who she was and what she wanted, but my mind did not know how to listen to her.
I felt foreign to myself.
I felt ashamed and devastated, that I had not been able to support him in his struggle, because, I lacked the deeper connection to my own soul, my healing power.
I realized that I was not ready to do any work, or help anyone else, when I was so removed from my own heart.
I could not grieve or feel anything. I knew that the biggest lesson of my journey was coming, and it was going to take me to face the parts of me I was so scared to see.
My shadows. My fear. My shame.
I knew what to do, I was good at it. But I still hid myself, and rejected the truth I felt.
That what I knew I wanted, what I knew he wanted, that every person I was meeting, or working with wanted more than anything was to feel Loved for who they REALLY are.
Beneath the masks, and the stories of their mind.
Is this something you have felt too?
Intuitively knew I had to go deeper into my own healing.
And so I did something radical. I went into a complete withdrawal from normal life.
I became celibate and started learning anything and everything I felt called to deepen my connection to my spiritual body.
I started studying coaching and mindset, and psychology as well as deepening my already very robust experience of spirituality through my intuitive practice.
I left my social circles. I pushed away my friends.
In the interim, I chose to study life coaching as a way to connect to people differently.
I wanted to speak to them about the truth. The truth of who they were and what they loved.
And so, for the next few years, I stripped away more layers. I went to graduate school and played around with different career paths, still uncertain of what I wanted.
Until one day, I knew I had to go all in.
I asked to be led, and I finally had the unwavering faith that the Sacred I had been longing for was asking me to step up and start doing the work I knew so well.
Guiding women and men to wake up to the truth of their power and their divine essence.
By whatever means necessary, but always leading with my intuition.
As I emerged from a long incubation period, I found the work method that made the biggest difference, as I realize that my inner work was only now beginning.
I explored all kinds of new age practices, none of which kept my attention for long, and as I realize now, like a tiktok hread every “new shiny healing modality/tool/practice” actually kept me away from being with God.
Crystals, spells, divination, angelic guides, akashic records, Reiki, channeling, all of these innocent, cool, fun, sexy practices were just fuelling my ego, and keeping me from surrendering to my True Faith.
I was obsessed with the yoga of sacred intimacy, shamanic teachings, and neo-tantric spirituality and realized that my intuitive work with archetypes, and sacred sexuality were quite attractive, and had a very practical application to the coaching and creative work I had been doing for years.
I got lost in it.
And, all I actually wanted to talk about and learn, and work with, was God’s direct guidance.
Essentially every time. would work with someone it all came down to being with God.
And so, I was forced to look into my darkness.
Where had I been neglecting my own relationship God?
My fear of submission to Him.
My fear of being “religious.”
My fear of being seen and judged as someone who is dogmatic, uncool, and sooo old school.
Well, I am.
I am a traditionalist.
I am conservative.
I want to follow Jesus Christ.
I believe in traditional family values and gender roles.
I am grateful to be a woman, finally reclaiming my femininity and my worth through my faith, not my “achievements.”
And I want to be in service to God and only His word.
I did not have the tools or the guidance to do it well efore, and I was lazy and scared to truly be in Devotion..
Until I woke up.
I returned to my Devotion.
I asked God to show me the truth.
I prayed.
And He did.
I found myself again.
I found myself in God.
I am still not anywhere near knowing His Grace fully.
But I am showing up and doing my best.
And that is all I want.
I want God to know I want Him to guide my every step.
Thy will, not my will.
It is a daily wrestle with my fear of His love.
My ego needs to die again and again.
So that I can truly live.
Fun, and Weird Facts about me:
- I love walking in silence.
- I am a Christian within the Russian Orthodox church.
- I am a great dancer unless there is a choreography to learn.
- I am part Russian, Native Colombian, Jewish, Spanish, and Polish.
- I used to be deeply ashamed of my heritage because- again- it did not fit anywhere. Now I am deeply honoured I get to claim all these awesome and mystical parts of myself.
- I speak fluent Russian, English, and French, as well as some Spanish and a bit of Hebrew.
- My favorite thing to do is Nothing. Staring at the tree outside with complete silence is bliss. (I have quite the masculine spiritual body.)
- I am an extroverted introvert. Crowds exhaust me unless I am on stage.
- I love how boring my life is.
- My favorite food is steak. Also, cottage cheese.
- I almost became a yoga teacher when I realized that building a coaching business is hard work. Happy I stuck through it.
- My favorite book is War and Peace.
